We expect growth to look a certain way
Think of a plant. When we buy one or plant a seed, we make sure it’s in the right pot, has the right soil, gets enough water, and is placed in the proper environment. Then we wait for it to grow.
We check on it daily. At first, we don’t notice much growth or any obvious changes.
Once the plant sprouts, we’re excited. We’re happy to see our hard work starting to pay off. But as the days go on and the plant continues to grow, the changes don’t seem as obvious anymore. Even so, we continue making sure it gets the proper amount of water and sunlight.
Sometimes a leaf turns yellow or looks different than expected. And yet, we don’t automatically assume the plant is dead.
So why do we expect our own growth to look any different?
We only recognize progress when we can see it
What are the visible results we tend to look for?
The number on the scale.
How much weight we’re lifting.
How our clothes fit.
How many days we’ve stuck to a routine in a row.
How quickly we’re seeing changes.
Don’t get me wrong. Those are also indicators of progress and consistency. But what about the progress nobody sees?
Our confidence to walk into a gym.
Our choice to try again after years of restarting.
The strength to set boundaries.
The decision to let go of old habits that weren’t helping us grow.
Not all growth is visible, and not all progress comes with immediate results.
One missed day doesn’t erase the care
Going back to the plant…
Just because you missed watering the plant one day doesn’t mean it’s dead.
It doesn’t erase all the care you’ve given it before. You wouldn’t just throw the plant away because you missed a day. You would water it again and trust that it can continue to grow.
Sometimes caring for a plant means changing something. Maybe it needs more sunlight, different soil, a bigger pot, or just a little more attention.
Think of yourself in the same way.
This is where growth connects with patience, not perfection.
Growth can look like going backward
Growth isn’t a straight, clear path.
There can be hills, uneven ground, and even a deep descent.
You might struggle with something you thought you’d already overcome. Your motivation might fade. You start questioning your progress or feel like you’re right back where you started.
As the holidays come around, you might eat a few more sweets than usual. A cheat day ends up becoming a cheat week. You told yourself you were going to stay consistent, even through the temptations, but things didn’t go as planned.
You didn’t fail. Acknowledge what happened, reflect on it, and get back on track.
Maybe there’s a pattern behind those moments. Take some time to reflect on the things that trigger old habits you’ve worked so hard to overcome.
Those moments of self-reflection are growth, too.
Stop digging up the plant to check if its growing
You wouldn’t keep digging up a plant just to check its roots, would you?
Doing so would disturb the very thing you’re trying to grow.
We tend to do something similar to ourselves.
We question whether we’re doing enough, whether our progress is happening fast enough, or whether our efforts are even working.
Stop inspecting every little detail. Keep showing up, and give yourself time to see the progress.
Continue caring for and nurturing the things you’re building. Make adjustments where needed along the way.
Give yourself room to grow
Growth doesn’t always look impressive.
Sometimes it’s quiet and slow. Sometimes you might not even recognize it until you look back.
TRACK YOUR PROGRESS
Take photos. Write in a journal. Keep track on a calendar.
Give yourself something to look back on when you feel like you’re not moving forward.
You are allowed to grow at a pace that doesn’t look like everyone else’s.
Don’t abandon something just because it hasn’t become what you imagined yet.
And remember, you can plant multiple seeds at once. Just don’t plant more than you can care for.
I BELIEVE IN YOU.
– Resetless
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